It has been almost three months since the first outbreak of the coronavirus infection from Wuhan, China. We do not need Pedro from the WHO to tell us about the outbreak. Thanks to him, we are now in a pandemic – the number of nations (111), the number of infected patients (~120K), and the mortality (4,205)! It had a significant impact on all sentient beings: one catholic nation canceled the annual Fashion Week and Ash Wednesday. One powerful nation found basic medicine ingredients, and health supplies, like masks, were controlled by others and not produced in their border, which has indirectly impacted on their homeland security. One nation’s lawmakers and senior officials got infected and died. One nation developed mobile viral testing, and one struggled to find the sensitivity and specificity of its nation’s test. Globally we saw the deeply dived stock markets, and at a personal level, we started social distancing each other with no hugging and no shaking hands. Some unresolved issues include where is the virus from, natural (bat, pangolin or civet), or man-made? Will the virus be sensitive to warm, and humidity, and will the virus go away when the weather is better; when will we have the vaccines and when will the outbreak end…..
In this article, several stories here look like to encourage people to laugh, from Wuhan to Beijing and from daily life to prison. It is a ridiculous tragedy. In a country where people can’t speak freely, people express dissatisfaction, disappointment, and anger at the government in this way.
I Can’t laugh! But I can’t hold it!
The WuHan epidemic spreaded around the country. I am very sad for the severe suffering of the people.
Who could have known the clowns in this government managed to turn this tragic event into a comedy. A great comedy! The so-called news is bringing us up and down like a rollercoaster. I think I am about to get sick.
I have been warning myself… don’t laugh, don’t laugh, this is not funny. Yet I can’t hold it anymore. Let’s laugh our hearts out!
They accused Dr. Li WenLiang of “spreading rumors,” and the whole country is cursing him. It was at the same level as prosecuting “the gang of four.” Yet, he was quickly praised for being ahead of everyone.
The 「expert」 first said no human to human transmission, can be prevented and under control. They the expert got infected.
The CCP central meeting, new year celebration, banquets, new year eve gala went on as usual, yet before the music ended, Wuhan was quarantined.
The governor of HuBei just said there is plenty of supply; then we heard the doctors told us there are no more masks in tears.
Japan sent some masks and showed their support by quoting some classic Chinese poems. The official medium of WuHan did what? They cursed the Japanese! He was just praised for this “ultra-nationalist” absurdity by some then got cursed again by ordinary Chinese people. Is this a child play or fighting an outbreak?
They just announced that all donated supplies have to be managed by the Chinese Red Cross. Moments later, all the management of the Chinese Red Cross was arrested for fraud.
They just announced just a handful of the case of infection. Yet the people are screaming bloody that they can’t find doctors and hospital beds. They were left at home to die.
They just accused that 「no hospital bed」 is a rumor. They said they are fully mobilized and will accept all patients. Suddenly the confirmed cases are more than 10 thousand.
Order on February 17 announced that WuHan quarantine is off, you may leave now. Within hours this was overruled by order on February 18.
Local news just announced that Gao Fu was arrested for corruption, higher up immediately said: “Damn, you are spreading rumors, too?」
They just got a new commander and ready for battle (new major of Wuhan). Suddenly the most secure place, the prison, blew up. Damn that the prisoners got infected!
So the prison warden became the big shot. It starts to crack down the jail, sick or not. It’s all secure, and not even a bird can escape. Bam! An ill woman drove from Wuhan to Beijing!
They just awarded workers who followed orders and resume work, then they warn us for the secondary outbreak. Where is that infection point? Oh, I may have jinxed it…
They published a big book, “A Big Country’s battle with an epidemic.” Not a bad looking book and full of “positive energy.” Yet it was removed from the shelf before the advertisement ended.
CCTV was just about to report a choreographed visit about improving situations: community service is in place, citizens came back to normal lives. Oops, an onlooker screamed: “Fake! Fake! It’s all fake!」 The reporter turned on a dime and said: “It’s good we know it’s fake, now we know what to do to improve…」.
The CCP head in WuHan said loudly: “You people need to show appreciation to the Party…” Before people can Kowtow to him, his speech was changed.
People on their knees were confused…” whom do we kowtow to now”??
You said this is like deaths in a family; they say you have to do it like a celebration. You don’t agree with that, yet he claimed the world owes him an apology? What do you do???
Comments: It is a widely circulated commentary of the timeline and absurdities that happened in China during the recent outbreak. It was done in a satire style in Chinese. However, it is impossible to convey that sarcasm accurately in the translation. The author is, for reasons you surely understand, unnamed.